In the book French or Foe, the author mentions flirting as a part of French culture. I was in Paris earlier this month and I believe that I was flirted with but not too sure. On one occasion, a girl kept looking at me for about 20 seconds maybe or more while I was alone in a cafe. She was cute but I just sat there and continued to eat my croissant.
On a bus, I saw another girl who was alone and she was cute too. I looked at her from a side angle and then she stared back at me. I have to admit that I am a somewhat a shy person and I got a little nervous so I instantly looked away. I was a little embarrassed because she caught me looking at her.
If a French girl looks at me is there some kind of etiquette or action of responding? I admit that I am attracted to French women but I have no intentions of dating since my main intention was being a tourist at the time. This was my first trip to Paris. Sorry if this is a strange question.
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This may not have had anything to do with flirting. French people do look at other people (in cafes, Metro etc) more than we do in the English-speaking countries. If you did want to speak to someone the fact that you are a tourist could give you a slight advantage, as you could ask some tourist-type question to break the ice.
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Go rent or buy the DVD of %26quot;Paris, je t%26#39;aime%26quot; and watch the chapter with Steve Buscemi. That should teach you all you need to know. ;)
Karl
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Karl - that%26#39;s so funny!!! Does that mean we just shouldn%26#39;t look at people in the metro, or does that pertain to busses and cafes?
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I%26#39;m sure that every attractive woman that makes eye contact with me is all aflutter, trying to figure out some clever way to attract my attention and fall into my arms. What can I say? The face I see in the mirror in the morning when I shave I Cary Grant circa: %26#39;Houseboat%26#39; handsome...though oddly many others seem to think I%26#39;m more Buddy Ebsen circa%26quot; %26#39;Beverly Hillbillies%26#39;...go figga%26#39;??) but for most other, mere mortal men, I%26#39;ve observed that not every woman who looks at them is flirting with them and hoping to be swept off of her feet. Sometimes they%26#39;re just trying to figure out a discrete way to tell you that a pigeon has just soiled your shoulder...your tie is in the soup...or you%26#39;ve just stepped in something that is not chocolate. Life is cruel.
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Excellent KDKSAIL. But when the girls look at me I guess they%26#39;re thinking that I am %26quot;something that is not chocolate%26quot;
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If they kept looking at you, it means they were finding you attractive...Otherwise, a girl is not supposed to make eye contact for that long with a guy...
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I don%26#39;t know about an American man flirting with a French woman, but I do know the opposite.
I just came home the other night. I spent the week in Paris alone -- well, not exactly alone. I had a different %26quot;boyfriend%26quot; every night of the week. One night I went to a bar called Barrio Latino (full of Moroccans, not Latinos); I left with a Moroccan who wanted to take me home with him. Uh, non, c%26#39;est pas possible.
The next night I found myself turned around at Montmarte, and a Frenchman stopped me on the street and became my personal tour guide for the rest of the night. We had a date for 20:00 the following night, and I stood him up; I still feel guilty about that.
The following night, I was approached by an Algerian at Centre George Pompidou. We walked around town together for several hours before he wanted to accompany me back to my hotel.
The last night, I was receiving some heavy flirtation from the Kabilian hotel receptionist.
I learned two things about flirting in France. First, it%26#39;s far and away easier than the States.
The second thing I learned is more complicated and has to do with the French language. When I speak to a stranger, I always use the formal %26quot;vous (you),%26quot; as do the French. However, I started to notice a pattern with these men. They start very formal -- vous. Then they start to drop the formality and call you %26quot;tu (also %26quot;you,%26quot; but not formal).%26quot; Then, they toggle back and forth -- vous/tu. This is where I think that they are testing the waters to find out just how receptive the woman is to their advances. If she responds, %26quot;tu,%26quot; in kind, then they think they%26#39;re in.
The hotel receptionist explained to me that French women want men to do everything for them. You will not have a French woman flirt with you or try to pick you up in a bar. You, as a man, need to make all of the moves (the way it should be); although, he said that it is exhausting, especially with the French-born Parisian women.
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%26gt;%26gt;%26gt;Otherwise, a girl is not supposed to (__fill-in-the-blank__)with a guy%26lt;%26lt;%26lt;
%26#39;..Supposing..%26#39; what girls do or not....has gotten guys into more trouble...than there%26#39;s been quantifiable %26#39;trouble%26#39; in the entire history of the human race.
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City :
there is no %26quot;vous%26quot; in Arabic so it is quite possible that the men you met hesitated between %26quot;tu%26quot; and %26quot;vous%26quot;.
I wonder how old the hotel receptionist was. Believe it or not, young French girls nowadays don%26#39;t sit silently waiting for men to make all the moves. It is a thing of the past!
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Thanks for the interesting replies. I am looking forward to return to Paris. The women were very nice I have to admit.
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